words
For some reason, I can’t keep my eyes off the short loop. There’s beauty in nature and in daily experiences. I think most people depend on others or a lot of money to feel this happiness, but I think,
happiness is always a state of mind.
Substantial
It's Friday night. The lights aren’t so bright. The wind’s creeping in through the crack from the window that's slightly open. Silent. I look upon the messy corner of my house. Cigarette ashes are scattered all over that place. It irritates me, yet I have no desires to clean it up as well.
I hear the sound of the rain. It’s dropping slowly and seemingly has no intention to stop. The distinct sound it makes when reaching down to the ground and deliberately streaming down from the branches, apparently bringing back the void in my heart. Countless thoughts are hovering around my head. I think, perhaps the sky wants to understand. There are innumerable things i want to write, but I don’t know how to define all these thoughts and translate them into the words. I keep questioning myself,
“Why do I feel so alone?” “Why do I feel so sad?”
“Why am i so afraid of tomorrow?” I'm feeling so exhausted and honestly right now, I have no energy left. But there is a reluctant feeling to just simply close my eyes and go to sleep. Nightmare hasn’t been bound to happen, yet knowing so damn well that sleeping will make tomorrow comes. And if tomorrow comes, old problems certainly still remain unsolved while new problems are arriving.
The fear
that all this
will end.
The fear
that it won’t.
Substantial
It's Friday night. The lights aren’t so bright. The wind’s creeping in through the crack from the window that's slightly open. Silent. I look upon the messy corner of my house. Cigarette ashes are scattered all over that place. It irritates me, yet I have no desires to clean it up as well.
I hear the sound of the rain. It’s dropping slowly and seemingly has no intention to stop. The distinct sound it makes when reaching down to the ground and deliberately streaming down from the branches, apparently bringing back the void in my heart. Countless thoughts are hovering around my head. I think, perhaps the sky wants to understand. There are innumerable things i want to write, but I don’t know how to define all these thoughts and translate them into the words. I keep questioning myself,
“Why do I feel so alone?” “Why do I feel so sad?”
“Why am i so afraid of tomorrow?” I'm feeling so exhausted and honestly right now, I have no energy left. But there is a reluctant feeling to just simply close my eyes and go to sleep. Nightmare hasn’t been bound to happen, yet knowing so damn well that sleeping will make tomorrow comes. And if tomorrow comes, old problems certainly still remain unsolved while new problems are arriving.
The fear
that all this
will end.
The fear
that it won’t.
